Funny Stories part-1(Raho Mast Har Dum)

-1-
On the first day of class I always conduct an "icebreaker" activity. The students are to stand, introduce themselves, and tell us something most people don't know about them. One student responded: "My name is Chris and I hate people that suck up to the teacher......by the way, Western Civ. is my favorite class."

-2-
I was talking to one of my kindergarteners while walking to lunch. She was telling me that her aunt, who was also her "fairy godmother", was taking her to Disney World.

-3-
I began teaching jive in my Grade 6 class and some of the boys were a little reluctant to hold hands, get close to the girls,etc.  I wanted to make the point that there are only a few places where people (especially boys) can learn how to dance, like school, their mom, or a friend. I gave a short talk and asked the boys, "Where can you learn to dance?" One of my students quickly replied, "A gay bar?"

-4-
I was teaching, or so I thought, some French culture to a group of 8th graders a few years ago, and we were discussing the martyred Joan of Arc. Being a (very bad) punster, I referred to Joan as the "original French fry." A student shyly raised his hand and asked, "I thought she was swallowed by a whale." Another student solved the concern by stating, "No, that was Jonah!"

-5-
I was student teaching in the first grade. We were just introducing addition.  One of the boys told me that he could add and he even knew how to do "attraction." I inquired about his knowledge. He said," Oh, you know! Like you've got 5 kids in the hall and 2 go into the bathroom. THAT'S attraction!

-6-
Three years ago I started teaching Kindergarten. I had the perfect mix of kids. I soon discovered I would become a grandmother that February. I told my class a couple of weeks before the baby was born that I would be missing a couple of weeks to be with my daughter when her baby came. One of my students (a girl) jumped up from her chair and said, "Oh, you gonna wear your hair up and wear old lady clothes!" What was so funny was her expressions of movements she made. She put her hand up like her hair was on top of her head and then motioned to her clothes. I was 42 when my granddaughter was born.

-7-
I was doing a Character Counts lesson on cooperation.  I asked my kindergarteners if anyone could tell me what cooperation means.  A little girl raised her hand and said, "Someone in my family had a cooperation and died!".

-8-
I was trying to hook up a laser disc player and was having a heck of a time getting it connected to the TV and VCR.  I asked the kids to sit still for a minute and give me a second to fiddle.   When I asked them if they knew what fiddle meant, Kelsey stood up and said, "You know...she has to go to the bathroom."

-9-
One morning, while we were doing our small group reading, my fifth graders kept on saying the word "he" for "we". This was quite unusual! Finally, it was Kaley's turn to read. She said "he" also. I corrected her and said it's "we" and she said "Okay, we, we, we!" The entire class was in an uproar because after she said the "we" three times everyone thought of the other we ("Wee!"). A few minutes later several children had to go to the bathroom. I guess it was because they were reminded to go!

-10-
My students had just come from a science class, where some of them tried eating sea weed. One of the students who didn't said, "I would never eat that." I told him that it is in many things he eats everyday. I said, "If the ingredients have kelp in them, then you are eating sea weed." He said, "Kelp? I thought that was those skirts the Scottish guys wear."