Self-Appraisal (An Inspiring Story)

PLEASE READ:- As you all know, Sardarji jokes are very famous in India. But we understand that these kind of jokes are targeted toward a particular community and is more a humiliation of them. WE LOVE AND RESPECT OUR SIKH FRIENDS AND DON’T PROMOTE ANYTHING THAT HUMILIATES THEM OR MAKE FUN OF THEIR COMMUNITY. This mail is posted on the website since we found this to be appraising and not humiliating.

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Self-Appraisal (An Inspiring Story)

A little boy went into a drug store, reached for a soda carton and pulled it over to the telephone. He climbed onto the carton so that he could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in ten-digits (phone numbers).

The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation:

Boy: ‘Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?

Woman: (at the other end of the phone line): ‘I already have someone to cut my lawn.’

Boy: ‘Lady, I will cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn now.’

Woman: I’m very satisfied with the person who is presently cutting my lawn.

Boy: (with more perseverance): ‘I’ll even sweepyour curb and your sidewalk, so on Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of Palm beach, Florida.’

Woman: No, thank you.

With a smile on his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.

The store-owner, who was listening to all this, walked over to the boy.

Store Owner: ‘Son... I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit and would like to offer you a job.’

Boy: ‘No thanks’.

Store Owner: But you were really pleading for one.

Boy: No Sir, I was just checking my performance at the job I already have. I am the one who is working for that lady, I was talking to!'

This is what we call ‘Self Appraisal’ ...

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WORD SCRABBLE [Amazing One]

FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE
When you rearrange the letters:
FLIT ON CHEERING ANGEL

DILIP VENGSARKAR
When you rearrange the letters:
SPARKLING DRIVE

BARA THEDA
When you rearrange the letters:
ARAB DEATH

PRINCESS DIANA
When you rearrange the letters:
END IS A CAR SPIN

MONICA LEWINSKY
When you rearrange the letters:
NICE SILKY WOMAN

DORMITORY
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z’S

A DECIMAL POINT
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE

MOTHER-IN-LAW
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

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 Banta’s Letter To Bill Gates

Subject: Problems with my new computer

Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. There is a button ‘Start’ but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.

2. We find there is ‘Run’ in the menu. One of my friends clicked ‘Run’ he ran up to Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to ‘Sit’, so that we can click that by sitting.

3. One doubt is whether any ‘Re-Scooter’ is available in system? I find only ‘Recycle’, but I own a scooter at my home.

4. There is ‘Find’ button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot trace the key with this ‘Find’ button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.

5. My child learnt ‘Microsoft Word’ now he wants to learn ‘Microsoft Sentence’, so when you will provide that?

6. I bought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows ‘My Computer’: when you will provide the remaining items?

7. It is surprising that windows says ‘My Pictures’ but there is not even a single photo of mine. So when will you keep my photo in that.

8. There is ‘Microsoft Office’ what about ‘Microsoft Home’ since I use the PC at home only.

9. You provided ‘My Recent Documents’. When you will provide ‘My Past Documents’?

10. You provide ’My Network Places‘. For God sake please do not provide ’My Secret Places‘. I do not want to let my wife know where I go after my office hours.

One personal questions.. How is it that your name is Gates but u are selling WINDOWS?

Regards,
Banta

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Santa’s Interview

Interviewer: Tell me the opposite of good.
Santa: Bad.

Interviewer: Come.
Santa: Go.

Interviewer: Ugly.
Santa: Pichlli.

Interviewer: U G L Y?
Santa: PICHLLY !!!!!!!

Interviewer: Shut Up.
Santa: Keep Talking.

Interviewer: Get Out.
Santa: Come In.

Interviewer: Oh my God.
Santa: Oh your Devil.

Interviewer: You are Rejected.
Santa: I am Selected.